"I smell booze." -Chele

"He's been known to make straight women gay." -Chele on Matt

"I think we just got called by Trivia." -Wee Sam

"Why do you always wear out the hole?" - Chandra

"There were too many B's in that sentence." -Chandra

"I do have a drinking problem." -Chandra

"How small is your mouth?" -Joel
"You should know." -Chandra

"I think choking on cock would be more embarrassing." -Neil

"My pants are unzipped, my underwear is in my ass, and I'm covered in lime juice." -Joel

"He had Harry Potter up his ass." -Chandra on Joel

"I BELIEVE IN VELCRO!" -Steve

"What did I do?" -Joel

"Give me some wood! I need some wood!" -Wee Sam

"Fish tacos are tasty." -Natalie

"He's in your pants." -Chandra to Joel on Neil

"Try Arthur Cox. Apparently he had more than one." -Neil

"If all else fails, rely on the booze." -Matt

"There might be a TV show called 'My Fat White Mammy's Ass'." -Rumpy

"Hershel Walker's my uncle!" -Wee Sam
"Is he Jewish?" -Dylan
"No, he's black." -Wee Sam

"You gotta love the lesbo action." -Natalie
"You didn't videotape it?!" -Matt

"How did it feel to be puddinated?" -Wee Sam

"I can't believe you did that. Rinse your mouth out." -Chandra

"Give me the hat. I'm gonna hunt me a Conway." -Dylan

"I'm a premature ejaculation. I just came in my pants." -Chandra

"I'm fuckin' around, fucker. Fuck." -Chandra

"Is anyone here driving a blue van?" -Natalie
"Yes." -Dylan
"They're going to tow it." -Natalie
"LIKE HELL THEY ARE!" -Dylan

"I was just starin' at your crotch. Kinda like how i was starin' at her butt." -Joel

"Because every time his wife gets hot he beats her with a shovel." -Chandra

"We should get him a Trivia Weekend hearing aid." -Anne on Dylan

"What a cunty answer." -Chandra

"He died of a drug overdose, so I'd go with the Green Party." -Anne

"Because Libertarians are Republicans on crack." -Bordo

"Anarchist Republicans... Oh my God!" -Matt

"I think you stuck it in wrong." -Bordo

"He just wanted me to say 'Idaho' so he could say 'Idapimp'." -Bordo

"You don't make a good chair. You poke too much." -Chandra

"Dirty white boy." -Chandra to Matt

"I've got soft and hard." -Steve
"He's very versatile." -Chandra

"You got a case of Diva-Ass." -Chandra

"That's good. Well, I don't like it, but it's good." -Chandra

"June and Chad double-ended a pickle and it was..." -Chandra
"Really HOT." -Natalie

"She'll just soak you with the juices." -Chandra

"I never get on that thing, and I never say anything interesting." -(Indistinguishable... please help!)

"You can't go wrong with flaming dog poo!" -Mary

"You wanna plug me in?" -Mary

"They call me the stud-finder because I find the wood." -Chandra

"And we haven't even realized that our dicks have been bleeding." -Wee Sam

"Anal cunt." -Wee Sam
"That's not anatomically possible." -Sarah

"Awww shit. Stoned Jews. I love 'em." -Wee Sam

"Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia is the fear of long words." -Phobia.com

"Quack." -Bordo
"Quack." -Wee Sam
"Quack." -Matt

"Oh my God your thigh is comfy." -Wee Sam

"Chandra, you just pulled 100 points out of your ass!" -Wee Sam
"No wonder Joel grabs it so much." -Chandra

"Your ass is the gumball machine of knowledge." -Wee Sam to Chandra

"I'll be your volunteer hostage." -Sir Chode of the House of Insanity

"My dick's erect!" -Chandra, pronouncing "Dixie Wrecked"

"Excelante." -Jay

"I like that you're bisexual." -Chele to Joel

"Stay outta my pants." -Kim

"I hope that was pudding." -Damned anonymous quote

"I've been blowing the bastard all weekend." -Rumpy

"See if we can get a partial on 'fuck you'." -Natalie

"I don't care enough about her to hate her." -Matt

"Last year it was about two months before I got it up." -Matt